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Viewpoints: Letters / Opinions

Real Reality Cruise Ship Woes

By Rob Holston

 

March 22, 2014
Saturday


Welcome aboard the USS Concep’tione 40 week world voyage.  You have been assigned a state-room where ALL of your needs are automatically taken care of: meals served 24/7 with ALL the nutrition perfectly blended and balanced for your individual physical and mental growth and development; climate controlled comfort; every detail taken care of.  The name on your state-woom might be Montana, California, Georgia ..... only problem is, it was assigned to you along with a womb-keeper.  Google WOMB.  She alone has the soul power to toss you overboard at any time during the first 13 weeks of your cruise for ANY reason, her discretion.  Your little heart beats frantically as you sense a stranger at your door.  You see the womb-keeper will be assisted by one person who has been trained to drag you from your room, kicking and screaming, you will be pulled from your room one piece at a time; arms & legs & then the rest, an early end to “once in a lifetime cruise”.  

If you are lucky enough to survival week 14 your fate will be governed by the rules written on your state-womb door.  It varies by state.  In almost all state-rooms if the womb-keeper says go, you’re gone.  Sorry, cruise over for you.  Some state-rooms have finish lines of sort set up in their “rules” week 22 in some, 24, 26 and such in others.  Get over the finish line and you get to complete the entire cruise where you will be welcomed by family and friends and given a name to recognize the identity you have carried with you since the very first day.

The womb-keeper though has a secret power, the power to decide to re-assign the name on your womb at any time during your entire voyage.  You see some state-rooms have a name where the rules allow the womb-keeper to elect your permanent eviction even on the last day of your voyage or when you are halfway down the gang-way.  Seems unfair, seems unjust from your point of view within your state-room, but it’s the womb-keeper’s  choice and choice trumps your life.  End of story; until the rules change.

Kindly,

Rob Holston
Ketchikan, Alaska

 

Received March 22, 2014 - Published March 22, 2014

 

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