(SitNews) Klawock, Alaska - When you get older, being single becomes funny. At least for some of us.

To a degree you become desensitized to the marriage and breeding happening all around you and since going out and finding someone to marry just so you too can have cute engagement photos on Facebook isn’t reasonable and being bitter sucks, you discover non-destructive coping mechanisms. Like fishing, and humor.
My college buddy Single Steve lives in San Diego and he’s embraced singledom in a way few have.

He’s promoting his soon-to-never-happen manuscript on his website via twitter:
“...the book is called “Nice Guy Finishes First”. It’s the story of me. Or at least I hope it will be. It’s a classic tale of your average nice guy and his quest to find epic, amazing, life changing love, in his 20’s, 30’s and hopefully not 40’s.”
Funny because we, along with other friends, have reached the age where we can laugh off the dating jargon dispensed freely by all.

“There are plenty of fish in the sea.”

Which reminds me that there are literally fish out there so tomorrow I’ll make a spur-of-the-moment trip to catch them.

“Just be yourself.”

Which of course is cool if you look like the dude who took his shirt off in the latest dystopian or post apocalyptic movie. But we know often times the girl doesn’t fall for the nice guy who treats her right, she falls for the flawed guy she thinks she can fix.

So Steve tweets things like, “At the gym. Trying to be less like me”, and dudes like me laugh because we know we wouldn’t want a shallow chick like that anyway. Dudes are just as bad, proposing to women just because they are wearing camo and holding a fish.

As much as we’d like to believe it’s all about who you are, the reality is we usually just say that to people to encourage them to not let their latest dating fiasco ruin them. It’s not that who you are isn’t good enough, it’s that the ‘who you are’ and the ‘who she is’ won’t become ‘you two’ because your flaws and her flaws aren’t compatible.

And there’s nothing wrong with that.

One might think that a guy like me or Single Steve is just hiding pain and inadequacy behind humor, but Single Steve’s not a self-medicating malcontent. He’s actually one of the most up-beat dudes I know all without being a walking self-help, life-coach type.

Why get all fussy about something that is largely outside of our control, right?
As single guys, we are the masters of our daily routine and our journey is a little different than that of the high school sweethearts, College lovers, Oops-better get married now, or Career? Check. Spouse? Check. crowds. We’ve got a period in our lives called the Sarcastic Realism Period and we occasionally wonder if we really are just a pair of aviator sunglasses, a tattoo and abs away from finding The One.

It’ll instead just take some time I guess, though a former colleague said once I announced I was moving to Alaska, “Now you’re going to have to find your wife online.” What killed me was that I’m pretty sure he was serious. It wasn’t a well-crafted joke to bring levity to my leaving. It was an honest, seemingly practical solution. A necessity in order for me to reach a married end because Alaska...island...duh, I should have tricked some girl into moving back to Alaska with me rather than trying to meet someone there.

Oh well. In the mean time, Single Steve has a life though he doesn’t have a wife, and I’ve filled my void with fishing. Yeah the conversations are a little shallow and one-sided, but it’s something to put time and energy in to while I wait for the woman with the right wrongs to swim my way.

Jeff Lund ©2014

Jeff Lund is a Teacher, Freelance Writer, & River fishing guide (Tranquil Charters) living in Klawock, Alaska
Contact Jeff at Email – aklund21@gmail.com

http://www.jlundoutdoors.com

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