 By Michael Reagan November 12, 2004
In this modern wonderland, there is much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth and some of the most outlandish jabberwocky ever heard. It is obvious that everybody here has suddenly become seriously unhinged. There stands the queen (her name is Barbra), looking at a map showing tiny urban dots colored in blue and an ocean of counties swimming in red. She looks with astonishment at these defiant out-of-control areas peopled by despicable common folk, and repeatedly shouts, "Off with their heads." She is joined by a chorus of her subjects - academics, journalists, and celebrities - each chanting different interpretations of what happened on Nov. 2, 2004. You can't avoid seeing what happened to the blue state denizens in these terms not when you are confronted with the absurdity of what they are saying about the avalanche of red state votes that buried their candidate, and what it all portends for America. The sky is falling, they screech we are doomed. We have been done in by a horde of dolts. Want a sample prediction of where the great unwashed in the south and in fly-over country are taking us? In a requiem for all that is good and just entitled "The Gathering Darkness of the Blue State of Mind," appearing on NewYorkMetro.com, one James Atlas saw the future Nov. 2 has thrust upon the enlightened citizens of the Big Apple: "On the Fifth Avenue bus, I gazed blankly out the window. The trees in Central Park were still in their vivid autumn plumage, red, yellow, and green set on fire by the early sun. I found myself thinking that what my friend Edgar, the radical novelist, calls 'incremental fascism'" doesn't seem so incremental anymore. "There will be a draft, and we'll have to leave the country: No way I'm letting our 17-year-old son, Will, be sent to Iraq. They'll drill the Alaskan tundra for oil, and the polar ice caps will melt; Manhattan will be inundated like in The Day After Tomorrow. They'll teach creationism in the schools; our grandchildren will scratch their armpits like orangutans and laugh, "Can you believe people used to think we were descended from apes?" Anyone who belonged to Students for a Democratic Society 35 years ago will be fingerprinted. The Patriot Act will be broadened to stifle dissent in the media-Paul Krugman will be sent to Gitmo. "The deficit will mount, and they'll loot Social Security; I'll end up in an SRO on upper Broadway. And the Jews will be rounded up like in Philip Roth's The Plot Against America. Did only Paul Wolfowitz stand between us and concentration camps in Kentucky? New York will be attacked again and . . . Wait. Maybe the guys in power want us to be attacked. What better way to get rid of all those noisome New Yorkers than to have an Al Qaeda dirty bomb explode in Grand Central at rush hour? No more need to bail out New York, because there won't be any New York." Because there are many sane clear-thinking people in New York, I will refrain from adding, "Good riddance." As many of my conservative colleagues have already noted, these people never, never, ever seem to get it. Cameron Kerry says with a straight face that John Kerry will run again, which is laughable. The New York Times sets out on a new four-year crusade to elect Hillary Clinton, which is also laughable. Even more laughable is the spectacle of Kerry voters in Palm Beach County seeking therapy for the psychological damage inflicted upon them by the Bush triumph of evil. Can't these people understand
that what they represent - a veiled form of elitist welfare state
socialism is anathema to the real Americans who don't live
in La La Land and will vote against anybody who does? They don't
understand because they don't know and will never "get"
what the red counties know.
Mike Reagan, the eldest son of the late President Ronald Reagan, is heard on more than 200 talk radio stations nationally as part of the Radio America Network. Look for Mike's new book "Twice Adopted".  All Rights Reserved. Distributed exclusively by Cagle, Inc. www.caglecartoons.com to subscribers for publication.
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