Columns - Commentary
Dave
Kiffer: Ketchikan:
Unplugged - It was a sad scene at one of Ketchikan's more
popular eateries one morning recently.
A mother and her two kids were
trying to get a breakfast meal, but the machine taking credit
cards was down. The kids were fussing and the mother was irritated.
"Can you take a check?"
she asked the counter person.
No, the restaurant no longer
takes checks.
Ok, she said, I guess I can
go to the ATM.
But most of the ATMs were down
too. She was out of luck.
For about 15 hours that week,
Ketchikan crashed back to the "Stone Age" of the communications
world.
With both cell phone service
and internet down because of a problem at Tolstoi Mountain on
Prince of Wales, an awful lot of folks were left with the modern
equivalent of two tin cans and a piece of string. - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
Jason
Love: Fishing
with Dad - My dad came down the mountain -- Big Bear -- holding
one commandment: Thou shalt go fishing. Dad is an old fisherman
and I ... well, I carry Purell.
My dad thought I was a natural
when he caught me, age three, plucking fish from the aquarium.
He freaked out like I was eating them, when it was strictly catch
and release.
Why, anyway, would I hunt for
something that costs a dollar at McDonald's? And while we're
asking questions, isn't "Filet-O-Fish" a little ambiguous?
Filet o' what kind of fish? Goldfish? Gefilte fish?
McDonalds: Ask us no questions;
we'll tell you no lies.(tm)
At least my dad didn't charter
a boat. Fish aren't the brightest of God's creatures, yet we
come on with radar, sonar, migration charts. Some fish just lose
their nerve and jump in the boat as you pass. - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
Preston
McDougall: Chemical
Eye on Giving Mules Their Sexy Back - Justin Timberlake,
a Memphis-born pop superstar, was recently dissed by the State
Senate in Nashville - apparently he is too sexy. If Idaho
Gem were to make an appearance during Mule
Day (April 12 - 15) in Columbia, Tennessee, I'm sure that
he would receive a hero's welcome - from the mules at least,
since he represents them getting their sexy back.
Mules, as you may know, are
a hybrid species created by crossing a jack with a mare. Farmer
Brown has 23 pairs of chromosomes, Sire Jack has 31, Dam Mare
has 32, but, like all mules, Idaho Gem has 31 and a half pairs.
This odd number of chromosomes
makes mules incapable of reproducing - the old-fashioned way.
However, cloning provides a reproductive pathway for sterile
animals, such as mules. Modern cloning technology made headlines
in 1996 when Scottish scientists took the nucleus, which contains
all 27 pairs of sheep chromosomes, from a mammary cell of a mature
ewe, and inserted it into an evacuated egg cell from another
ewe. The lamb went to full term, and was named Dolly in consideration
of her origin, which was ramless. - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
Bob
Ciminel: Things
I Don't Care About - I don't care how Anna Nicole Smith died
or who fathered her daughter. I don't care what Sean Penn thinks
about George Bush. I don't care that the Justice Department fired
eight Federal prosecutors, just like I didn't care that Bill
Clinton fired 92 of them. Heaven knows we can always find more
lawyers!
I don't care what Al Gore thinks
about global warming. In fact, I don't care about global warming.
If we stopped global warming today, tomorrow the liberals would
begin complaining about global cooling! Besides, if you listen
to the enviro-wackos, all we have to do is elect a Democrat in
2008 and the globe will stop warming.
I don't care if Hillary Clinton
wins the 2008 presidential election or that the Democrats control
Congress. In the four years they have to totally screw up our
government, judicial system, tax code, and war against terror,
they will guarantee a Republican president and Congress for the
rest of my lifetime. I will go into retirement comfortable in
the knowledge that my grandchildren may have the opportunity
to live in a world at peace, but if they don't, at least they
will live in a country that can still kick butt in any part of
the world that does not want world peace. Are you listening,
Iran? - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
Dan
K. Thomasson: Trumpets
sound for global warming - What's that old line: "The
end of the world has been delayed indefinitely because of a shortage
of trumpeters"? Well, there's an increasing number of them
now. Hardly a day goes by when someone hasn't signed up to trumpet
the Apocalypse, from Al Gore to international scientific panels
and even the U.S. Supreme Court.
Whatever your feelings about
global warming, the political realities of it are here to stay.
If there was any doubt about that, the high court dispelled it
with its narrow ruling that puts the Environmental Protection
Agency on notice that claiming lack of authority to regulate
greenhouse gases in auto emissions won't cut it.
Between the lines of the court's
opinion is the recognition that "yes Virginia, there is
a boogeyman" and it comes in the form of chemical elements
that are trapping the heat of the Earth, an opinion that preceded
by only a few days a long anticipated international report that
90 percent of the problem is manmade. For any agency or administration
to ignore this issue in the face of such an overwhelming chorus
of warnings is to flirt with political suicide. - More...
Wednesday AM - April 11, 2007
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